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:iconmichel-le-fou:
It is interesting that you chose Dubai as the setting, so I must assume that you live or have visited there. Your description shows familiarity. That is sufficient to say that it is interesting, since it may be the first story that begins there. The development of characters and plot is very standard, and I think you are versed in the technique enough to see it through. You spent sufficient time and effort to describe both sides of the city as well as the characters you introduced here. Attitude and atmosphere were also adequate. I have been the first to browse it and it does compel further reading; so, I hope others will think likewise.
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:iconzakemur:
Zakemur Featured By Owner Feb 11, 2013
Thank you for the very first critique i have ever recieved. You helped me see what my writings need. I am working on the second chapter. I did not to continue working on it, because i thought my story was dull, but now i am more confident.
Thank you!
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:iconmichel-le-fou:
Michel-le-fou Featured By Owner Feb 11, 2013  Professional Writer
You are welcome indeed. Good luck on chapter 2.
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:iconmichel-le-fou:
Michel-le-fou Featured By Owner Feb 11, 2013  Professional Writer
You are welcome indeed. Good luck on chapter 2.
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