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OK, what impressed me immediately was your use of tercets, albeit unrhymed. That is the choice of the poet always. The content-and I aver that it matters more than form-is interesting, perhaps riveting. On the surface, on both counts, it displays originality and imagination, which I herald in literature. The tercet struck me immediately, and it should do with every reader; that compels reading further.
The following stanza are quatrains, which are standard form in poetry too. The old poets including Persians like Kayam, wrote them ably.used Every detail was entertaining despite the solemnity of the subject. Keep writing and submitting.

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LyingViaPoetry Featured By Owner Dec 13, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you for the feedback and all those cool words I don't know :D
Michel-le-fou Featured By Owner Dec 13, 2012  Professional Writer
My pleasure. Use your online dict.
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